Sunday, April 26, 2009

Nice Guys

This rant is probably the most beautiful things I have ever read.  So first, you must read it before I continue on.

http://www.stwing.upenn.edu/~jenf/writing/rant04.html

I have been trying for a good month now to fathom how to write an ode to all the nice guys, and I wish I was lying.  But its the truth.  I have thought time and time again how I have no guy friends this year, and I understand why.  Many of them felt it was time to be jerks, because they wouldn't get laid otherwise.  I guess its true, and I do not have an answer to why.  Also, I have hormones.  I have hooked up with many of my good guy friends, and it saddens me because you now create an air that cannot be taken back.

I wanted to create this post as a follow up to honestly and truly say, I'm sorry.  I am so sorry because I have been that girl.  That hypocritical clueless girl.  I have been the flirt, I have been the girl needing an ego boost, I have been the girl who knows full well that I am treating you badly, and not changing my ways.  I have also been that girl who has dated the wrong guy time and time again.  And why I am truly sorry, is because I am still that girl.  I'm sorry I haven't figured it all out, and I still haven't.

What I loved most about this rant is the undying hope expressed.  I ask to please please please, do not give up on me, I am still learning.  I can't explain why I've done the things I have done, but I can express that you have saved my life time and time again, taking the bullet that sometimes even I have fired.  You are truly a man, a husband, a friend, and a selfless lover.  Do not give up hope, we do grow up.  I will grow up.  And one day, I will be choosing you.

Thank you, for I can't live without you.

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