Tuesday, September 22, 2009


I'm not. At least, I don't think I am. Its hard to say. Everyone expects me to be homesick, and I do feel a little uneasy on the weekends when no one is around to do anything. But I'm okay.

At home I loved to do things on my own. Shopping, walking, riding the train, getting to and from work or school, reading or sitting by the river, eating. I lived by the philosophy of having at least one "me" day, and all the other days of the week be "we" days. This is what I miss. I miss just having my iPod and deciding where I will be going or what I need to get or what I want to do - and actually doing it. I could do it all subconciously - knowing how much money I need, or knowing I have to stop by an ATM on the way, or by a Starbucks. It was something I never had to consider and think about.

I tried to do this when I went to the pharmacy. It was nice, and I'm really glad I had something sort of like home. But it wasn't the same because I wasn't familiar enough that I had to be so aware of my surroundings so I don't get hit by a car, or get lost, or get hit on by the wrong people.

So I miss "me" time. But as much as I miss the company of my family and friends, I'm okay. I can admit that I don't remember what their hugs are like, or what their laughter sounds like, or how they smile, but I know I'll get to see them again soon. And I can tell them all about the friendships and bonds I have made here. I was always told that I adapt well to new surroundings, and I'm easy to get to know. It was tested, and I'd say they are pretty right.

So, I'm okay. And its nice to say that for once.

Thursday, September 17, 2009


I've had an interesting 2 weeks here. I am overloaded with school work and my job and trying to find time to keep in touch with everyone back home, but I am quite satisfied with my time here.

A large part of this weeks topic in my Reflective Woman class is the ability to be heard. Some of my favorite quotes from the book thus far are,
"We must help the oppressed be listened into speech."
"Your silence will not protect you."
"It is our shared commitment toward a world in which the inborn potentialities of so many women's minds will no longer be wasted, raveled-away, paralyzed, and denied."

I've cried over this book on multiple occasions. I'm quite emotional, but its hard when you know you have been that passive girl, allowing yourself to be walked over. And it isn't easy, which is sometimes misunderstood. And most of all, being silent will not make it easier.

But I have a hard time grasping why silence is considered so negative. Sometimes we need to let ourselves be silent. Its hard to listen and speak; how can I listen for the changes necessary when trying to speak them at the same time? Being silent in fear is a negative thing. But being silent in awe, and being silent to let others speak, and being silent so you can embrace the world around you? That is definitely a necessary part of living, that should not be ignored either.

Silence has a sound. We just have to learn to listen for it.

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Long Haul

It took weeks and maybe even months to prepare for this moment... but here goes.

I am a college student.

This is when the rest of my life begins.

Its weird. It took a while to settle in, with the opening celebrations and 3 day orientation and classes starting so late. I'm still not completely settled either. I found out I got the Social Justice Coordinator job, so I start work Monday. I still need to get my laundry card. I need to get ink cartridges. Its as if it never ends.

But right now, its nice to say I am here in one piece. I am spending my saturday night alone, since my roommate went home for the weekend. Its pleasant - nice to soak it in.

Heres a toast to a wonderful year.